So last night I went out... It was my friend's birthday and because she is in a band and sings REALLY good Jazz she had a gig and couldn't celebrate it... so I gathered up 3 girls and decided to head over to the restaurant and listen to her ... "Jizz" (what she calls her racy Jazz). We did not order food, although one girl ordered fries later (fancy restaurant lol) But we did order a bottle of Shiraz and began the night. The dynamic was pretty funny, myself, my good immigrant friend, a total free-spirited hippie and a conservative yet feisty law student, oh and to add on all ladies being single... so ofcourse the convo got raunchy pretty fast... what happened was the conservative yet feisty law student has fallen for my neighbour... a guy I went to high school with and who I am great friends with his sister who also has hooked up with a few of my friends (????) anyways, apparently his dorky charms have haunted her... but apparently so did his "cock by coke can" pictures in her phone (haunted all of us too) and then subject quickly turned to the "hairy men vs. bare" question... 3 out of 4 voted neatly maintained hairy (not the poof of chest hair adding volume to your shirt) where 1 voted for bare. And then a question struck me... is all body hair curly? or are there races with straight wispy things?.... total free-spirited hippie exclaimed that yes they are all curly but the curl actually depends... from ringlets to a wave... I'm still not sure, nor do I want to really conduct a research... but I'll take Friends' Pheobe's song for the universal standard...anyways the convo got even more explicit and our voices raised among the quiet elderlies. Point is I texted my neighbour shunning his behaviour towards conservative yet feisty law student... "saying he wants to keep things physical yet makes comments about how superhuman their babies would be" (not normal !!!) ofcourse too shamed he did not respond... oh i should add he also has been trying to get in my pants for 8 years now...
In my opinion if a man is trying to get successful friends without benefits he must adhere first to these rules...
1) no cuddling... maybe a little but no spooning!
2) don't ask questions about her feelings... and do not mention yours of any sort...
3) avoid serious eye contact during the deed
4) text only after the deed to thank and dont have a conversation
5) Give compliments on looks not on personality traits
6) schedule the next time of meeting... avoid making her feel cheap at anytime
7) if you are afraid of these commitments then don't hook up more than 3 times... or she'll get attached
Its a fine line between attachment and a woman feeling cheap...but if you can balance that then its a admirable skill. Because in my opinion a stable friend with benefits is just as hard to find as a good boyfriend.
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